Last Week for Submissions!

Hello Piglets! Wait. Pig-heads? No, that’s worse. I’ll get back to you.

Anyway, Saturday, January 27 is the last day to submit a monologue or story for our March Monologue Café. There has been a little confusion as to what we are expecting for this, so I hope we can clear it up:

What we want these pieces to be about is really your own experience with an unfair power dynamic. This certainly was inspired by the national conversation we are having on sexual assault, but we think it goes much further. There are certain things we as a society have decided to accept as “the way things are.” We are all starting to realize that our acceptance comes at the expense of the safety and well-being of entire sections of our population.

These are the stories we want to hear from you. If you have never written a monologue before, don’t worry. Just tell the story as you would tell it to a friend. We don’t need professional, publishing-ready writing. We want your voice. It can be tragic, humorous, or everything in between. And if you felt like you were the person using your power, we want to hear from you too.

And remember, if you are not comfortable sharing your own words, we will have one of our actors perform them on your behalf, and you can remain anonymous. What matters to us is giving the community an opportunity to get things off their chest, and learn about the trials of others they may have never considered.

Email laughing.pig.theatre@gmail.com today to submit a piece. There are no rules to these monologues, but if you want to read some examples we posted a couple here and here.

*You do not need to be located in AZ to submit a piece.

You are welcome to perform your piece, but because of the sensitive nature of what we are asking we do not require that you read your own work. We will have performers standing by to bring your words to life. If you choose to perform your monologue, you must be memorized and available on March 21st and 22nd for dress rehearsals (7:00-10:00) and for all performances March 23rd, 24th (6:00pm-9:00pm) and 25th (1:00pm-5:00pm). 

Submissions are due January 27th, 2018 by 11:59pm. The Monologue Cafe will be a public event, and video and audio recording is ok. As part of your submission, you give Laughing Pig Theater the rights to utilize audio, video, and still images from the Monologue Cafe for professional purposes. You will retain all rights to your work. For future reproductions by Laughing Pig Theatre we will request your permission.

We will be selecting monologues for the performances by February 10th. For every selected monologue, if the writer does not wish to participate in the performance, they will receive one comp ticket for the night of their choosing.

To purchase tickets for our Monologue Cafe, click here.


A Great Night of Improv!

What a great show: the crowd, the laughs, it didn’t suck! #Success

Friday, January 12, marked our inaugural event: A Night of Improv. And we at Laughing Pig couldn’t be happier with the outcome. Ok…if we had all got signed for the Daily Show or SNL, that might have been better (Trevor, Lorne: we’re out here).

Barring that improbability, it was a roaring success: about 30 guests came for the improv show, and about half of you stayed for the workshop. And we all had a great time! Based on your feedback, we’ve done just what we’ve always hoped: create a safe, inclusive space for everyone to be involved.

And for that, we owe you all a BIG THANK YOU: for showing up, for showing out, and for showing your support for local theatre arts (and the financial support is a BIG plus)!

With such a great turnout, you can bet Laughing Pig will bring you another night of improv. Between now and then join us at Mesa Arts Center’ Acting Studio for our Open Improv Jam, Wednesday nights at 7:30pm. We’ll learn basic improv skills, play different improv games, and have an opportunity to socialize and build community around our common interests: the stage…or comedy…or just being silly for a couple hours.

Coming up next from Laughing Pig Theatre:

  • February 9: Improv Techniques for Dialogue – in this 90-minute workshop Ada McCartney will share her teaching and acting expertise by training you in different ways to use improv to improve group dialogue and drive effective, critical conversations. This is a great workshop for students and educators of all levels, professional facilitators, community organizers. Really, anyone who talks to groups of people can benefit from these techniques.
  • March 9: Long Form Improv Show & Workshop: join us for another night of improv, as we delve into “long form” improv theatre. Not as widely seen on stage, these games will focus more on building the world, delivering cohesive scenes, and showing off our acting skills. But dont worry: there will be plenty of laughs to go around.
  • March 23 & 25: Laughing Pig Theatre’s Monologue Café – we’re looking for your original stories related to and inspired by experiences of sexual assault, the abuse of privilege and power, and challenging the status quo. These works will be performed March 23-25, at the Mesa Arts Center. Submissions are due January 27, 2018.

Quick S/O to AlphaGraphics for the prints and stickers that make us look good. Another S/O to Jessika Smyers for the brilliant photos she took. As always, many thanks to Mesa Arts Center for providing a space for us to play. And, again, Thank You for joining us and helping to build a community around Laughing Pig Theatre.



A Night of Improv! (Friday, Jan 12)

Join Laughing Pig Theatre on Friday, January 12, for our inaugural event: A Night of Improv at the Mesa Art Center’s Acting Studio!

7-8pm – IMPROV SHOW: featuring Taylor and Tony Moschetti, Tony Holt, and Ada McCartney.

8-9pm – WORKSHOP: Join us in playing many of the games from the show and exploring the fundamental tenets of improv.

PAY WHAT YOU CAN  ($5 recommended)


See you soon – LPT


Men- we want your monologues, too!

Needing a little monologue inspiration for your hump day? Check out this gem dealing with power and masculinity by LPT’s Community Director, Tony Moschetti:

There are few things in life quite so satisfying to a
young boy as beating his older brother at something. I don’t
know why. Maybe it’s a primal survival instinct to try to
establish your dominance over a threat. Maybe it’s a
Freudian response to try to prove yourself as an heir to the
family, and not be the Remus to his Romulus. Maybe its
just because that bastard always made you play Mortal
Kombat with him but never let you learn the moves first
and he would always just push you to the side of the screen
even though you called Corners on him and just freeze you
with Sub Zero over and over like the little bitch he was and
now it was time that he got his!

Whatever it was, it has always been important to show
off to your brother; to prove that you’re a MAN. And
nothing says you’re a man like Sex and Violence.
Of course, violence was a staple between us growing
up, and, my brother being five years older, I must admit he
had me beat. But sex. That was uncharted territory. As we
got older, we discovered that neither of us was very good
with girls. But I had the advantage that by the time I
reached high school, sex was becoming popular. It was
rumored that at one point our town’s school had one of the
highest rates of teen pregnancy in the country. Although my
brother had already experienced girls by the time I started,
in relation I was on a role. I had my first girlfriend younger,
my first kiss younger, and my first argument with my
parents over whether or not I was really, truly, deeply in
love because its totally not just a crush and you just don’t
understand when I was younger. But there was still the
Holy Grail. Real-live physical sex with a girl. All my
previous victories meant nothing if I could not accomplish
this earlier than he had.

My brother lost his virginity 2 weeks before his 18th
birthday. By the time I was 17 this was appalling to my
peers. But I had a deadline to beat, and it was looking grim.

I was a scrawny, pale, hairy, awkward, geeky redhead.
Needless to say, my resources were a little scarce, and they
were quickly exhausted. It takes a special kind of girl to
find the ginger offspring of a skeleton and the Geico
Caveman sexy. It didn’t help that many of the less shallow
girls were still “saving themselves,” which we all blamed
on the fucking Disney Channel.

But then a ray of naked misguided sunshine showed
down unto me, exactly one week before my time was up.
My very first girlfriend, the one who I swore I would be
with the rest of my life but then tried actually to be with me
THE REST OF MY LIFE, came back into town. Our bad
terms had faded, and we had become long distance friends.
Better yet, her time away had made her gloriously immoral.
Long story short, she came to visit just in time to get
seduced onto the floor of my shower, wedged between a
linoleum wall and an optimistically flailing young boy.
That was one of the most disappointing days of my
life. This big event, this achievement I had worked for so
long and so hard, was not all that exciting. I kept waiting to
feel different, but after about 10 minutes of absentminded
pumping, both of us left unsatisfied. How was this
supposed to make me a man? How was flopping into the
arms of someone I wasn’t especially close to supposed to
be a turning point in my life? How could it all be such
bullshit? Even at my age now, there is still so much hype
put into “getting laid” and “becoming a man,” but I don’t
compete anymore. I don’t know what I expected to win.
I’ve had sex since then, maybe more than my brother,
maybe not. I don’t care anymore. All I know is we’re closer
than ever now. I look at high schoolers since I’ve left, and
its all just gotten worse, all the little boys looking to be the
Big Player, and all the little girls so eager to help. And I
don’t have the heart to tell them it goes nowhere. I don’t
have anything to prove. And I think that’s why I’m a man.
Continue reading “Men- we want your monologues, too!”


Sample Monologue

Do you want to submit a monologue that challenges the status quo, or deals with an abuse of privilege/power? Are you craving some inspiration? Laughing Pig Theatre has your back! Check out this awesome monologue by LPT’s own Taylor Moschetti. She wrote this for a character named Sam, and generously agreed to let us share it.

SAM: So, I just got a gym membership, finally! I mean, I had one for a while, but with work, and the move, and things starting to go downhill with Rich and I, it was just the last thing on my mind. So I was just paying for it for no reason because obviously I wasn’t going—so I cancelled it. But now, I’m settled in the new place, I’m getting into more of a routine at work, and I don’t have a boyfriend to worry about anymore, so I figured what the hell! I found this really cool place, kind of expensive but it’s because they have everything you could ever put in a gym. And you know, talking with the membership guy, and touring the gym, it was actually super exciting. I started planning what workout classes I was going to try, and thinking about what kind of protein shakes I could make at home, and how I was going to take pictures of myself every day and post them online so people could see me losing weight. I was going to be a brand new person.

So, I signed up, but on that first day of working out… I decided to hop on an elliptical, which was a bold choice, I know. Look at me, you can imagine how much of “this” body would move on every stroke, so I tried to take it slow—but even through my headphones I could hear the machine creak because I’m a 300 lbs. woman essentially riding a standing up bicycle. … and of course I’m walking while everyone around me is fucking running. I’d love to run. I used to run. But right now I’m walking. Just doing what I can do because that’s what you do when you work out, right? And this random guy spots me across the room on an elliptical just like mine a couple rows away. He was an older guy, like probably in his 50s, but, obviously in good shape. Everyone there is fucking incredible shape because it’s a fancy gym for people who want to show off their body and compare their gun sizes with other beautiful like-minded people. I digress, this guy uses his index finger to gesture me over to him on his machine, god forbid he interrupts his own workout because obviously I needed the steps, but he pulls me aside, says he wants to tell me something…I know what it sounds like, that he’s going to say some awful thing about how I don’t belong there, and my machine is making ungodly noises because I am too fat for it. But no. What he says instead is how proud he is of me for coming to the gym. He tells me, he knows that I have a long, tough road ahead of me, but he thinks it’s so great that I’m trying to get better and become the beautiful self I deserve to be, rather than being this fat masked person I am now—and to keep up the great work because he saw me really struggling today, but if I keep working at it, I will be like him and all the other beautiful people who belong in this gym in no time.

I get it. I know he was trying to do something positive. I know he felt like it was important to encourage me. But you know, it felt like the same shit. The words might be nicer, but he was still going out of his way to remind me that I was different, that I didn’t belong, and that I needed to change. I mean, would you ever say something like that to a skinny person? Would he have said it if I were just 20 lbs. overweight, instead of…you know, whatever I am. Would he have said it if I were a man? I don’t know why people feel the need to constantly remind me that I’m not like everyone else. As if I’m not reminded a thousand times a day already. Whenever I pick a chair to sit in, I have to choose wisely because certain arm rests don’t fit my current body shape like I wish they did.  Whenever I travel and have to fly anywhere, as soon as I board the plane, I can see everyone’s eyes looking at my body shape and hoping that I am not sitting near them because I will clearly take up more space than I am worth. And even before that, when I book the plane ticket, I contemplate buying two seats on an airline where I can reserve them together, so I don’t inconvenience anyone and don’t have to have that awkward conversation with another passenger asking me to scoot over that, I know, is inevitably going to happen. Or even whenever I talk to my family on the phone, they ask me how my weight is and how I am working on it, and what crazy diet or fad they think I should try because I am not normal or healthy even though my doctor says I am healthy and my vitals look great for being the fat piece of shit I apparently am… I know that I could go on and on with other colorful examples of how my weight affects my relationship with everyone in our community, but that is not the point. I know I’m different. I don’t want to be. I’m trying not to be; don’t they see that?

Well, after that chat with that guy, I worked out for as long as I could, then went home. All I had the rest of the day was water. I think that guy would’ve been proud of me.



Laughing Pig Theatre wants your monologues related to and inspired by personal experiences of sexual assault, the abuse of privilege and power, and challenging the status quo. We are seeking diverse storytellers willing to submitting personal pieces that illustrate the full range of emotions part and parcel to the experience: humor, tragedy, everything in between. The only guideline is that it must be your original work. These works will be performed in Laughing Pig Theatre’s Monologue Cafe, March 23rd-25th, 2018, at the Mesa Arts Center. Submissions are due January 27th, 2018.

You are welcome to perform with us in 2018, but because of the sensitive nature of what we are asking we do not require that you read your own work. We will have performers standing by to bring your words to life. If you choose to perform your monologue, you must be memorized on March 21st and 22nd for dress rehearsals. All performances will occur on March 23rd, 24th, and 25th.

Submissions are due January 27th, 2018. The Monologue Cafe will be a public event, and video and audio recording is ok. As part of your submission, you give Laughing Pig Theater the rights to utilize audio, video, and still images from the Monologue Cafe for professional purposes. You will retain all rights to your work. For future reproductions by Laughing Pig Theatre we will request your permission.

Submit your monologues to laughing.pig.theatre@gmail.com, or contact us with any questions you have.